The Thailand itinerary almost everyone recommends

Search for a Thailand itinerary and you'll find thousands of them, most of them the same trip with different photos. So we went through 60 of the popular ones - Lonely Planet, Rough Guides, the big tour companies and a stack of backpacker blogs - and counted what they actually tell you to do.

They agree to a surprising degree. Bangkok is in 57 of the 60 and Chiang Mai in 48, and most of them do the north first, then fly south to the beach. Two weeks usually splits into about three nights in Bangkok, three in the north and six or seven by the sea.

Bangkok: 3 nights

Almost every itinerary starts here, because almost every flight lands here. Three nights is the standard and it's about right: enough for the temples, a market or two and a proper go at the street food before the city wears you down. Our list of things to do in Bangkok has more than you'll get through.

The favourite day trip is Ayutthaya, the old capital, about an hour and a half north by train. A third of the itineraries include it, nearly always as a day out rather than an overnight. We've written up a day trip that adds Suphanburi too.

Chiang Mai: 3 nights

Fly. It's about an hour and ten minutes, and flights are cheap and frequent. The romantic option is the overnight sleeper from Krung Thep Aphiwat station, which takes about 13 hours. It's a cool experience even though it's not much cheaper than flying - book second class, because the berth is basically the same as first for half the price.

Three nights covers the Old City temples, Doi Suthep and a day out of town. Our Chiang Mai guide has the rest. Most itineraries now say the same thing about elephants, and we agree: don't ride them, and pick a sanctuary that's actually ethical.

Only a handful of the itineraries mention the burning season. From roughly February to April, farmers burn fields across the north and the smoke settles in Chiang Mai's valley, with March usually the worst. If that's when you're coming, skip the north and give the time to the beach.

Chiang Rai turns up in a lot of routes as a day trip, but it's about three hours each way by bus. Give it a night or save it for next time.

Railay: 3 nights

From Chiang Mai, fly straight to Krabi. There are direct flights of about two hours, so there's no need to go back through Bangkok. From Krabi airport it's a taxi to Ao Nang, then a longtail boat round the headland, because Railay has no road in.

Most itineraries base you in Ao Nang. It's the easy option, with good hotels and restaurants, but the beach is only OK and the reason you came is a short boat ride away. Railay is the one with the white sand, the turquoise water and the limestone cliffs, and it's one of the most beautiful places in Thailand. Stay there if you can. Tonsai, next door, is where the climbers go.

Koh Lanta: 3 nights

From November to April there are boats down to Koh Lanta, about two hours. The rest of the year it's a minivan and the car ferry, closer to three. Lanta is the slow-down stop: jungle in the middle, a waterfall, long beaches and good snorkelling and diving nearby. It's where most of the itineraries finish.

About one in five itineraries puts Koh Phi Phi here as well. It's crowded and expensive by Thai island standards, and Maya Bay - the beach from The Beach - can feel like a theme park at peak hours. We still tell people to go, but as a day trip by speedboat, leaving as early as the operator will take you. Maya Bay closes every year from 1 August to 30 September.

Back to Bangkok: 1 night

The guidebook routes mostly fly you home from Krabi or Phuket, and the blogs tend to finish with a night in Bangkok. Getting from Lanta to Krabi airport and up to Bangkok takes most of a day, so if your flight home leaves from Bangkok, don't try to do it on the same day. If it leaves from Krabi or Phuket, skip this night and give it to Lanta.

Between May and September, go to the Gulf instead

The route above is for November to April. From May the rain moves onto the Andaman coast and some ferries stop running, while Samui, Phangan and Tao sit in a rain shadow and stay fairly dry through the summer. It's why the tour companies run two versions of the same trip, one for each coast. The Gulf version keeps Bangkok and Chiang Mai and swaps the beaches:

Koh Samui has its own airport with direct flights from Chiang Mai, but they're pricey. The cheaper way is a flight to Surat Thani and then the bus and ferry, which takes five or six hours door to door. From Samui it's about an hour and a half by ferry to Koh Tao, Thailand's scuba-diving capital, with Koh Phangan on the way if you'd rather split the time.

The Gulf gets its own heavy rain from October to December, which makes October the awkward month on both sides. February to April is good on both coasts.

Only got a week? Pick one

Hardly any of the itineraries try to fit Bangkok, the north and the islands into a week, and the ones that do spend half of it in transit. Do Bangkok and one other: two or three nights in the city, then either Chiang Mai or a beach for the rest.

Three weeks: add Pai and Khao Sok

With a third week, the most common additions are Pai, in the mountains north-west of Chiang Mai, and Khao Sok National Park on the way down to the coast.

Pai is three hours from Chiang Mai by minivan, on a road with 762 curves, so take something if you get travel sick. It's the kind of place people stay in for two days or two months. Three nights gives you the canyon, the hot springs and the waterfalls; almost nobody thinks one night is worth the drive. Our list of things to do in Pai has the rest.

Khao Sok is jungle-covered limestone mountains, caves and an enormous lake, and a night in the floating bungalows on Cheow Lan Lake is one of the best things you can do in Thailand. Getting there from Pai takes a whole day: the minivan back to Chiang Mai, a flight to Surat Thani or Krabi, then a couple of hours by road.

Where most itineraries go wrong

Too many stops is the complaint that comes up most on the travel forums, because every move costs you half a day of packing, transfers and working out where to eat. The usual rule is three or four bases in two weeks, and the route above is already at four.

Two islands is not so bad when they're a short boat ride apart, like Railay and Lanta. If we're honest, though, we'd still pick one and park ourselves there.

And don't try to do both coasts in two weeks. Getting from one to the other is a full day, and in most months one of them is in rainy season anyway.

What they all leave out

Koh Chang is in one itinerary out of 60, and it might just be our favourite all-round island in Thailand. It's on the eastern Gulf near Cambodia, a bus and a ferry from Bangkok, which is probably why it never makes the classic loop.

Kanchanaburi, a couple of hours west of Bangkok, makes only one itinerary in four. With jungle, waterfalls and the Death Railway, it's a far better use of two nights than a third island.